Facebook Essays (2/3)

WHAT ARE WOMEN LOOKING FOR IN RELATIONSHIPS?


So I just got married February 14th, 2010.  I thought that I knew what women wanted in a relationship.  As it turns out, I knew what she thought she wanted in a relationship.  Let me explain the difference between what a woman wants and what a woman thinks she wants in a relationship.  Follow me.

It is a very interesting world that we live in these days.  The society that we're a part of is full of outside stimuli that guide our every thought and decision.  It's a gift and a curse for a woman because as you may or may not know, women like well designed, extravagant, expensive, cool and shiny things (e.g. the engagement ring that I gave her made her go bananas) and they also sometimes find it hard to come back down to earth once they begin to engage in these whimsical worlds revolve around the things they like (e.g. fashion and jewelry and reality tv and if I go on with this list I might not finish this question).

So when looking for a stable relationship women sometimes forget that they are actually a part of two distinct worlds.  One where reality is far far away, where things just work together, where they look 'hot' every hour of every day, where seemingly every day is their birthday and they can do no wrong.  The other world is the one that men live in where logic is king, sports is priority, and if you can't afford it then you probably shouldn't buy it.  Attempting to reconcile these two worlds day by day is what helps a relationship between a Martian and a Venusian to survive and thrive (check out Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus if you didn't get that reference).

So put simply what I thought women wanted initially were the basics: food, shelter, faithfulness, and fun.  What I've found is that women say they want these things but there are more things too. They let on that they would be truly happy if they could just get these simple things.  But I submit that that is a falsehood.  As a man, there is so much more that you must provide and if you fail to realize this then maybe you should take a twenty second timeout and think about what you're doing in your current relationship (disclaimer: if you're married you can't take that timeout, you don't have any left . . . just keep playing).

The thesis and bottom line to all of this is that women want your time and attention.  If you can't afford to give them that then the food, shelter, faithfulness and fun won't make one bit of difference.  I was very proud to provide these things and very baffled to find out that they didn't mean as much to her as I thought they would.  Venusians need lots of hugs and kisses, walks in the park and extended visits to organic grocery stores, and lastly lots of engaging and affirming conversation with eye contact included.  If you can provide this then you will be able to level up in the game of relationship, and if you can't then you'll end up starting the level over with woman after woman after woman.  So let the games begin.  God speed and good luck to my fellow men out there.

just one more part to go . . . part 3 coming right up

:)

Facebook Essays (1/3)

So Facebook is looking for beta-testers for their new products and they want you to do some essays as a part of their screening process.  Here are some questions I answered . . . it was a very introspective afternoon for me actually :)

WHY IS CORPORATE RESPONSIBILITY A JOKE?


In light of the BP oil leak incident, a lot of questions about corporate and government responsibility have come up.  People want to know who is responsible for this and how this could have happened if the private business (BP) was paying attention to what was going on.  The answers to these questions amuse and sadden me at the same time because depending on who your news source is you will find 360 degrees of opinions.

It seems that if you have enough money, you can pay your way to putting yourself in a positive light.  In this money hungry world that we live in, greed trumps integrity (from what I've observed) which makes it impossible to believe 100% of what anyone  has to say about anything.  Since the sentiment about the news, which people take as absolute truth, varies from channel to channel people end up becoming puppets of whatever their favorite flavor of news media is.

So why should I believe you if money can make you call the truth a lie and vice versa?  It is no different with (some) corporations.   The idea that everyone is a puppet makes the idea of believing in a system of corporate responsibility laughable.  Believing what the big company tells you might not be the best idea, unless you do your research first and find that your facts match theirs.  But wait who did you go through to get your facts?  That's right another big corporation.  So who can you trust?  Read on.

On the other side of the spectrum that is why we have faith and hope.  Without at least a little of it everybody would be down in the dumps all the time.  We must do our part with honor and respect and then have faith in our world that other people are doing the same to make this place we inhabit a better place for years and years to come.  Ask good questions, do your research, and hope for the best.  That is all.

stay tuned for part 2 . . .

TicTacToeTen X PTA Convention

It is going to be epic.  The Tic Tac Toe Ten Project is traveling to Memphis, Tennessee to tell the Parents & Teachers Association chapters of America why educational, collaborative and social games (e.g. Tic Tac Toe Ten) need to be integrated into every child's K-12 curriculum.  We will talk with heads of educational policy, teachers, parents, fundraisers, students and educational companies to see where opportunities lie for us and for them.

In addition to making contacts, we will be celebrating the release of TicTacToeTen for iPhone/iPad/Android!!!  Our mobile application development will serve to complement the work that we are doing with the educational board games.  We will also unveil our newly designed website, our new t-shirt design, and our forthcoming puzzle books that will be targeted to 3rd-8th grade kids.

So if you're in Memphis this weekend, come on by the Convention Center to booth #425 and take a picture with the team (and Blanco below).  We'll be talking education, tech, and games all weekend long and we'd be honored if you'd come on out and join us.  We'll see you there.

live.love.learn.

Smelling the Roses [Picture Poetry]

[begin prose]

Sometimes I need to stop . . . 

From whatever I'm doing . . .

Job that I'm working . . . 

Dreams that I'm pursuing . . . 

Pause for a minute and just halt the confusion . . .

To step away is to see that it's all an illusion . . . 

My generation has come up with this conclusion . . .

They label you as worthless unless you're moving . . . 

You're nothing unless you're high functioning, hustling, doing . . .

No motion unacceptable slow motion is for losers . . .

I asked for more fast but beggars can't be choosers . . . 

Now that I've come to terms . . . 

With what I am and what I can . . .

And cannot do, I'm feeling like the plan . . .

In these last days and times is for me to understand . . . 

How to make more people smile and to be a better man . . .

If not for me for my fam I suppose . . . 

Stay tuned as I try to be honest with myself . . . 

To be still before God and to stop to smell the rose . . .

[terminate prose]

Amen

Playing Around w/ TweetMySong.com

mic check 1 2 1 2 . . . first single getting airplay in Ghana

:)

stay Living Loving & Learning

Settling In

So it has been approximately 65 days since I said "I do" to my beautiful new wife Uwimana (ooh-wee-muh-nuh) Middleton and I must say that I feel like I'm back in school again. I knew that women were different in my head but actually living with one, caring for one, laughing and snuggling up with one . . . it's definitely NOT intuitive.

I figured that we'd have our fair share of ups and downs in the first weeks. Moving into a new 1 bedroom, 1 bathroom apartment with 0 furniture and 2 different lifestyles was sure to be a challenge right? Right indeed . . . I didn't think that I would be so moved to abandon my bachelor minimalist ways so soon, but it has indeed happened. Here is a list of things that I didn't used to do that I do now (without being told, I might add):

1.) Take out the garbage
2.) Sort through the garbage and separate recyclable/compostable materials
3.) Wake up and turn on a pot of tea
4.) Spend large amounts of time in supermarkets & grocery stores

Inn addition to the above here is a list of things that I've purchased that the old minimalist bachelor would never have dreamt of buying:

1.) Kenmore sewing machine
2.) A loveseat with throw pillows
3.) A television (you're reading correctly, no I didn't have one before)
4.) Lots and lots of wine (makes for romantical evenings . . . thanks Flav)

So all of this goes to show that I am moving up in the world . . . slowly kicking and screaming (on the inside) from a boy to a man. It's not so bad though. Uwimana has blessed my tummy many times with delicious meals and has been a good sport about most of the hobbies and other activities that I'm interested in. My music, business, and sport lives are all still intact and on the flip side her sewing, babysitting, and gourmet chef passions are all alive and well. It's funny that in marriage counseling we were given three C's to marital success (communicate, communicate, communicate) . . . it is funny that that's actually all you need to not make each other go crazy. Thank you Jesus and thank you Pastor for the awesome advice. I'll be updating very soon on marriage and other topics but until next time, keep keeping on.

Getting Started w/ Supercool School Pt. 2

So here's second part of what you should do when you first sign up for Supercool School . . . click this link and be enlightened.